Third Culture Kids

“Where are the kids?”
“They’re downstairs playing with the neighbor kids."

Kids with neighbor friends

“Where are the kids?”
“They’re downstairs playing with the kids who live in the apartment building.”

“Where are the kids?”
“They’re downstairs playing with the other kids.”

Sometimes it is tempting to think about all the things we have given up by coming to live on the islands—all the opportunities for family, fun, and fellowship—and regret their loss.  It can be especially tempting to feel this way about our children.  There are so many opportunities to play sports and pursue passions in the US.  There is a summer camp for every sort of interest—boys camp, girls camp, sports camp, space camp, dinosaur camp, etc.  Our kids miss out on that.  And sometimes we feel sorry for them and for ourselves. 

Friends made at big island conference

But there are other times when we are given a glimpses of the benefits.  For all the things we’ve had to give up, there are things they have gained.  I think we’ve written before about how blessed we feel to know that our children have experienced the diversity of multiple cultures, the tremendous gift to be able to grow up speaking more than one language, and the empathy and understanding they are able to feel for people who are different.  But this month we were struck by another strength this life has taught them.  Indulge us for a moment as we brag on our kids:

This past month we were in Kenya.  We rented an AirBnB for most of our time there.  The apartment building had lots of kids—Kenyan kids—playing around outside.  After a few days, our kids were playing with them.

We went to a meeting on the big island and there was a family of 5 kids, whom our kids had only briefly met years ago.  Yet all of them were fast friends and kept each other occupied through the whole weekend.

Back at home now on Clove Island, there are kids in our apartment block visiting from France for the summer.  Our kids are downstairs playing with both them and the neighbor kids (whom they call their best friends).

Friend made on a weekend visit

I know kids make friends easily.  I know some of this is dependent on personality.  I know there are some kids who could make friends with anyone anywhere, but I was not that kind of kid.  I was intimidated by other kids of the same culture, and I’m convinced I would have been even more intimidated by kids of a different culture.  I don’t see my kids as especially outgoing.  I think this is a skill that they have developed living on the islands.  They have learned to make friends across cultures.  They are less intimidated by different languages, clothes or accents.  They pick up on the local games and they share games of their own.  In short, they are more adept at navigating across different cultures.

Kids are always growing and changing.  Whether they will always be as comfortable moving among different cultures as they are now is an unknown.  But I’m convinced the lessons they are learning today will be a benefit to them as they grow.  

PRAYERS ANSWERED
Our teammate made it safely to the UK.  She has a lot to do while she is there.  Pray that all her appointments and things will be able to happen.  Our short-termer seems to be having a good time in the island home where he is staying and making good connections with the family.  We are quickly getting back into our normal day rhythms, which includes classes, team days and picnics.  Tom was at a picnic yesterday and on three separate occasions got to share about the Kingdom. Since getting back, we’ve heard several encouraging stories of islanders sharing with other or studying and growing together.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
An old friend who Tom studied with ages ago recently came around asking to set up a time to study again.  A few days after that another man came by who also wants to study.  Pray for all the logistics of these opportunities to work out.  We prefer not to study with one person, but in small groups, so pray that these men would be able to find others with whom to study.  Our house-helper’s pregnancy has advanced to the stage where she is no longer able to work.  Pray for her health and the health of her baby and that we would figure out what to do in the meantime.  Continue to pray for peace, justice and stability on these islands.  A recent tax increase on all imports is making life more difficult for everyone and there are shortages on some staple supplies. Across Africa we are hearing reports of third waves of COVID, pray for mercy on these countries and had the islands could be spared.