Bottlenecks

Avoiding Nairobi traffic by walking!

A bottleneck:  What happens when a great deal of things need to pass through a very limited space.  I’ve been thinking about bottlenecks.  In life it seems like we are always running into them.

This past week we were in Nairobi - A large city with traffic problems.  This is probably the most classic example.  Too many cars trying to drive into or through the same narrow road ways—Nairobi has this in abundance!  But then we got back to the islands this week and found that there is no frozen beef!  Why not?  A bottleneck.  There is one port and after weeks of stormy weather, it is backed up.  Apparently the refrigerated meat has been sitting on a barge at a nearby port for nearly a month.  But it must wait it’s turn, and until then—no beef!

Air travel is another example of bottlenecks.  Normally air travel to and from the islands is rather uniform and somewhat smooth, but every year during wedding season there’s a bottleneck.  Everyone wants to come back for a wedding, and that causes havoc with tickets and luggage. Too many people, too many bags, not enough planes.

Visiting with friends on big island

But bottlenecks aren’t only something that happen with transportation.  They happen in other parts of our lives as well.  We have been guiding our newest team members through the process of language learning and culture.  Here we have yet another bottleneck.  There is absolutely no way to cram a whole language into a normal person’s brain as fast as one might wish.  Rather it has to trickle in slowly over time.

As an organization we find a bottleneck with leadership.  We have many people who are willing to come and give their lives for this work, but not enough people to guide them.  This bottleneck means the numbers coming to join in the work are slowed, and for good reason.  Good leadership can make or break people in a difficult setting.  But good leadership takes maturity and maturity requires time, time filled with experiences and lessons learned— so it’s another bottleneck that requires waiting and patience. People do not become mature overnight.  The road of experience, study, practice, prayer, and guidance shape us in maturity and it is a hard, slow process.  It simply cannot be hurried.

Why must so much of life be bottlenecks?

A friend of mine has been searching for truth.  He asks great questions, but there is so much truth to share.  It can’t happen all in one visit.  Another bottleneck!  In visiting our colleagues on the other island we hear of how truth is being obscured and tainted with false teaching and we see how the bottleneck of truth causes trouble.  If only our friends knew more of the truth—then they would not be swayed by false teaching.  Some of them haven’t even learned the basics and they’re being swamped with things out of their depth.  If only the bottleneck could be removed and everything could be absorbed and understood all at once—then this would all get sorted out.

Our water filter at work!

I thought of one more bottleneck as I was writing.  In our kitchen our water filter takes a large bucket of water and filters it through a microscopically small ceramic working, down a thin tube and drips it slowly into a bucket on the floor.  Another classic bottleneck problem.  And yet, this one I’m thankful for.  Do I wish it would filter faster sometimes?  Yes.  But the water that goes in at the top is often brown and gritty.  It carries dirt and dust and disease.  But the water that comes out at the bottom is filtered, refined and pure.  Good and safe for drinking.  We can’t rush the process without messing with the final product, the process is important.

And so it is with truth and maturity.  Some bottlenecks and the waiting they require seem like just a waste of time and we could certainly do without them, but others—others are important because the process matters and the ending is worth the wait.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
We’ve made it back to Clove island with all our bags and no worse for wear.  Megan’s recovery is still going well.  The kids went back to school today and all of them reported having a good day—something they were nervous about after their missing 3 weeks of school, so we are very thankful for that smooth transition.  Our printing project was completed and we are giving the finished product out to friends already.  Pray that these would be a blessing to them. 

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Pray for Tom’s friend who is still wrestling to find and understand truth.  Pray for island brothers and sisters with some big travel decisions to make.  Pray that they would make wise decisions.  One of Tom’s friends has remarried his wife!  Pray for a healthy marriage and for opportunities to encourage them to walk in the light.  We are getting ready for a short-termer to come.  Pray that her final financial needs would come in and that she would be able to buy her plane tickets this week.  Pray for her final preparations and for a blessed time with us.  Our team members will be returning this week.  Pray for safe travels.  They are in Kenya now.  Pray for the political stability of that country. We passed through the big island on our way home and saw Ma Imani— her daughter is doing much better but she has some kind of infection in her breast (it’s unclear whether cancer is a concern). Pray for healing, good doctors and good treatment. She is also discouraged by the island brothers and sisters she has met on the big island and the divisions and unhealthy interactions she has witnessed. Pray for her that this would not shake her and for the community on the big island that truth, reconciliation and unity would be found by all.

The Urban Witch Doctor

Another thing the islands don't have-- playgrounds!

The islands are not very urban. We live in the “capital” of our island but it is only urban if you compare it to the rest of the island villages— at most it is a town, a small densely populated town. For Megan’s medical treatment we have come to mainland Africa— here they have cities! Full-fledged modern cities. I know people have different preconceptions about Africa of the rolling savanna and wild animals, but Nairobi is a very much a modern city and  is becoming more modern all the time.  It has so many things that we don’t find on the islands. Skyscrapers are popping up on the horizon.  High end restaurants, chain stores and malls with the some of the brand names you’d find in any US mall are here in multiple locations.  You can pay by credit card nearly everywhere.  Internet is fast and reliable.  You have 4G mobile networks and all the apps that go along with them.  You can order Dominoes pizza.  You can catch a ride with Uber.  Nairobi feels like a place with all the modern conveniences, and yet it still keeps its African flavor.

Just some of the examples on our short walk

It was while we were walking down a street that we noticed a sign slapped to a telephone pole.  It seemed to be an add for a doctor.  This seemed a bit odd, but hey, people slap all sorts of posters  and adds on the sides of buildings and telephone poles—why not one for a doctor.  But a closer inspection revealed that this was no ordinary doctor.  “Love potions, lost items, man power, magic rings. job promotion, protection…”  this was no a doctor of medicine.  This was an advertisement for a witch doctor.  And as we looked around we noticed more and more advertisements of the same sort, some in English, some in Swahili, but nearly every telephone poll had an ad for someone, sometimes multiple different ads on top of each other. 

Witch doctors seem like something from the village. Something that would have disappeared in such a modern city.  Islanders often hide the fact that they still have witch doctors. But we have been there long enough that we are not at all surprised to hear that many islanders go to see witch doctors for everything from sickness to football matches, but in the big modern city?  Aren’t such things left behind?  Our western side asks, “don’t they know better”? But old beliefs are hard to shake and the desire for a quick-fix to our problems is universal. In the village everyone knows where to find the witch doctor, but apparently the urban witch doctor advertises.

We all have seen the magazines in the check out counters promising ‘5 minutes a day to rock hard abs’ or  “10 ways to keep your lover”, or “3 changes to make to get that big promotion at work”.  It’s all about power and control.  We want to be able to do something about our problems and ideally something easy and uncomplicated. One culture may look to witch doctors, while another looks to scientific studies or dubious “expert” advice, but they both promise the same thing, “get what you really want, now, the easy way.” 

It’s all about getting your way, of finding a way to have power over your difficult circumstances.  It is tempting. We see the promises and want the results. So we foolishly put our trust in the wrong things.  It something we can all fall into too.

This one's a professor

So we have to walk past false promises and remember it isn’t about us getting power and control  but about relinquishing it to the One who has all the power and control anyways.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
Megan went back to the doctor today for a follow-up. She is healing well and the lab results on the cyst showed no malignancy. So that’s great news. She’ll have to have follow-up in some months but she has almost no more pain and has her energy back.  We have been blessed by our time in Kenya— the kids have made some good friends and the medical stuff has gone smoothly. Thanks for praying. Our colleagues on the big island were able to go to the memorial service for the American who died and said it was good to be there. Our teammate is back on the island safely. The printing project should be ready to pick up tomorrow!

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Pray that Megan would continue to heal well and that there would be no recurrence of the cyst (the surgeon said it was 50/50 whether it would come back in the coming months or years). We have one more day in Kenya, pray that we get our necessary errands done. We fly back to the islands early Thursday morning. We’ll have one day on the big island before going to Clove. Pray for smooth travels. Pray for Tom as he has taken on the job of interim leader for all the islands while our leader is in the States. Pray for wisdom, humility and discernment in that role. There has been hopes for a medical team to start on the other side of Clove Island— we’re excited to see this happen but first they need to find people to lead the team. Pray that the right person/people would be found.

Responding to the Dark

There is a lot of darkness in this world. We see it around us all over the world. There is pain and suffering. There is lying and corruption. There are people that act selfishly and intentionally hurt others. No matter what country you live in, these things surround us.

Our son with Dati's little one

We were in the middle of a team meeting, but when Dati arrived, she pulled up a chair and started to tell us the latest update in her painful saga with her husband. We have mentioned it before in previous posts. It was an arranged marriage (not unusual here), but her mom didn’t do enough research about the guy. In short, he is not a good guy. He showed Dati no love or affection, got her pregnant right away, but quickly stopped providing for her (which is the father’s responsibility especially during pregnancy and until the child is weaned). Instead he left her, stripped the house of anything he paid for, has offered no food or money and to add insult to injury, he has publicly questioned whether she was a virgin before they married- seriously shaming her in Island culture. Dati is a sweet woman. She is not hot tempered. She is a hard worker. She wants to trust in God as her island faith tells her to.

When all this started to happen, she was naturally upset. But she told us that she would keep looking to God and she would seek justice for herself and her baby. She started by going through mediators. She didn’t see her husband but talked to his relatives. A few times during the pregnancy she got money for food this way. Then she gave birth but even with the mediators she wasn’t able to get any help for the birth or for baby supplies. The mediators started avoiding her.

But she was confident that it was her right to be provided for, so she went to the courts. They went back and forth, until it seemed like the courts had agreed that her husband must pay. The only remaining question had been how much. They were supposed to do some research into what a reasonable amount would be. She seemed content with the outcome but it was obvious that she was holding a lot of bitterness for her now ex-husband. He was like an animal to her. She assured me that God would deal with him in the last days. I warned her to watch her heart. I told her that anger can ruin your heart. She assured me that she wouldn’t lose her temper or start fights. Before I could clarify what I meant we were interrupted and she had to leave.

So here Dati was with a chair pulled up to our group. I was expecting her to say that an amount had been decided and that it was finally over. Instead she told me that her case had been handed to a new judge who hadn’t been given any paperwork or explanations of the previous meetings, instead he just ruled against her, throwing out her case.  Another typical example of the island justice system.

She was completely disheartened. She said she wasn’t going to appeal or go back to the courts. She was going to just trust in God. We shared our sadness at her news, at the darkness in the world and in our own confidence that God could provide for her. But then her face hardened as she told us, “Yes, all the students and the religious leader at the neighborhood religious school are going to pray down a curse on him.” These curses are supposed to be very powerful, causing the person to die or go insane. She said this with satisfaction and seemed to think that we would be happy with this course of action. She knew that we trusted in God, isn’t that what she is doing?

Megan home from surgery

But we surprised her. We shook our heads and told her that we weren’t pleased to hear this. Curses and hate are darkness too. You don’t fight darkness with more darkness. You fight darkness with light. God is light! Tom ended up explaining a lot that morning about the kingdom of darkness and the kingdom of light.  At the end she prayed. I’m still not sure if she understands how our world-views are different, but it is a start. The darkness is all around us but it is also within us. If our response to darkness is to succumb ourselves to hate, bitterness and revenge then we lose the battle. We admitted to her that forgiveness and love is not easy in these situations. Thank goodness we don’t have to do it on our own.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
Though it got off to a late start yesterday, Megan’s surgery went smoothly.  She got out the same day, but was feeling pretty groggy on the way home.  Friends in Kenya and even new friends we have just met have been of great assistance to us, watching kids, giving us meals, helping us out with rides and internet.  We have been greatly blessed.  Our island coworker’s surgery went well too and he is back on his feet and back to the islands.  The orientation course is going well.  Our other teammate got her new passport and our kids are enjoying their time in Kenya.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Pray that during this week Megan can take it easy and get back to full health.  An American organization on the islands lost one of their members to illness this past week.  It was sudden and completely unexpected.  Pray for the family, friends and members of that organization.  Pray for a short termer who will be joining us in February.  She is both excited and nervous.  Pray that all her preparations will go well and that her time with us will be blessed. We have a printing project that we trying to get done while off the islands, pray that the logistics would come together for it. Pray for Dati that her heart would be filled with light even in these dark circumstances.

Becoming A Bride

Bride and all her friends/cousins at early wedding event

Marriage is a big deal on the islands. Not only are the weddings important to their culture, but islanders believe it is their religious obligation to get married. We’ve had islanders explain to us that to not get married is a sin. We have one religiously-minded student and for some reason I was having to explain what a “monk” was. As I explained that monks took religion seriously and wanted to please God, our student was nodding happily- to him, monks were sounding like good guys. But then I mentioned that monks didn’t get married and he stopped smiling, “Oh, that is bad. They are not good men then.”

So marriage is important to islanders. Adultery, polygamy and divorce are rampant and even expected parts of marriage, but the idea of being married (versus remaining single) is an important expectation.

Bride hidden inside during men's wedding event

Marriage is a life changer no matter what culture you are in, but this week we were particularly struck by the difference it makes for a young bride. Many of our students are young people and so we have seen the transformation from unmarried woman to married woman several times. Many times the transformation is remarkable.

An unmarried woman is supposed to be modest and demure- not attracting a lot of attention. Most keep their head covered and they are aren’t supposed to be wearing make-up and much jewelry. A new bride on the other hand is an attention grabber. Her lips are bright red with lipstick. Her head is often uncovered. She is often wearing new sparkly clothes and wearing a bunch of the shiny gold jewelry from her wedding all over her neck, ears and hands. People that don’t even know her will be able to tell you that she is married and may even call out in greeting, “How the bride doing?” A bride attracts attention.

We have seen young women who we would have called shy, exude a new confidence once they were married, engaging us in conversation in new ways, maybe with the feeling that they are now our equals?

Bride & groom for the climatic wedding event

A few months ago, we got the news that Ma Riziki was marrying off her youngest daughter, whose name sounds like Queen. This was a little bit of a surprise, since she is still a teenager, she’s still in school, and she has an older sister who isn’t married. Forgive us, but our first thought was, “Is she pregnant?” Still not sure that answer to that question. Queen has never been one of the demure, modest girls. You didn’t have to talk to her long to catch her attitude and self-confidence or to see the slightly mischievous, rebellious glint in her eyes. She has never been very soft-spoken, deferential or even polite to us as people older than her. She often was sent to our house as a messenger for her mom and most of the time she just walked right in (without the customary asking permission) and didn’t even bother with greetings unless I forced her to. So how would getting married change her?

This whole past week has been packed with wedding obligations. Ma Riziki honors us by asking us to be very involved and grouping us with the family. Our daughter was included in the group of young women and girls and I was grouped with Ma Riziki’s close friends and relatives. Remember on the islands there can be a whole week full of wedding events, but the initial ceremony is actually the simplest, the legal wedding part. So when I dropped by the next day to talk to Ma Riziki about the next day’s event, she ushered me instead to pay my respects to the bride and groom. So suddenly I was sitting down in the home of a married woman. Queen kind of giggled and looked shy and embarrassed as I greeted them, unused to having an adult conversation with me. She is still just a teenager but at some point some of the responsibilities of a hostess kicked in and she offered me something to eat and asked after Tom and the kids. As I left I smiled to myself, marriage is going to change Queen too.

Then as for any island bride, the wait begins for the next culturally and religiously mandated change— from bride to mother…


PRAYERS ANSWERED
We were able to fly safely from our island to the big island in time to catch our flight to mainland Africa! (It was a close call because heavy winds and rain were interrupting interisland travel for a couple days beforehand.) The travels went well and we are very thankful for the house we get to stay in while in Kenya and for the support of friends and colleagues in the area. .  

PRAYERS REQUESTED
We met the surgeon today and redid some tests. Megan is now scheduled to have laparoscopic surgery to remove an ovarian cyst on Monday, January 15th. Please pray for a simple surgery with no complications. The hope is that she can be discharged the same day. Pray for our time in Kenya as we will try to get some things done here that we can’t do on the islands (medical, dental, educational evaluations for kids, printing projects). One of our island coworkers is in the hospital here after having emergency surgery— pray for quick healing for him.  Tom had a good final time of study with the guys he’s been meeting with.  Now it is up to them to decide what to do with all that they have learned.  One of our teammates had her cell phone stolen while on vacation— pray for her in all the complications and hassle that causes. Three of our teammates are going to be involved in a 3 week orientation course for new overseas workers— pray for a blessed time of learning and connecting with other workers. They began today!

Reviewing the Year

One final holiday activity- decorating cookies!

Happy New Year!  This time last year we were still in the States, just preparing for our return to the islands.  Much has happened in the last twelve months that we can be thankful for.  Sometimes it’s nice to get some perspective on things to help see the progress that’s been made.  On our team we talk about dividing our time into 5 areas: language, service, team, relationships and prayer.  We thought it might be nice to see the progress we’ve made in these areas.

Language
We’ve made a great deal of progress in language, both individually and corporately.  It has been exciting and encouraging to see our three new teammates from this year take on the task of language learning and succeeding.  Megan and I have also seen advances in our language, whether it’s leading study groups or times of prayer in the local language, we see our understanding continue to grow.  We can share more deeply then we used to and can speak with friends on deeper subjects.  Maybe one of the greatest parts of language learning has been learning to tell the story of the 2 Kingdoms in the island language.  This has been a great joy!  But even more widely, we have seen translation work move forward in leaps and bounds this year.  It’s been a lot of hard work, but the work is paying off as we are starting to see more materials and even songs come into use in the local language.

Our daughter at wedding event

Service
What an exciting year this has been for English teaching!  Our own team of available English teachers was greatly reduced in size, but we have seen islanders take up the reins and English programs spread greatly.  It has been exciting for us to share our teaching in more advisory and training roles.  This even included a teachers’ workshop organized by islanders to encourage change within the school system!  What a wonderful thing to be a part of.  We have continued to work hard on improving our English curriculum, we’ve opened an office for people to come and learn about our group, and we help out with lots of English classes, including two English Clubs that are very well attended and give opportunities for great relationships and discussions.

Team
Have we ever told you how blessed we are to have such a great team around us?  We started as three.  Tom, Megan and our old teammate.  We were soon joined by another woman who has brought so much laughter and joy as well as a strong work ethic to our little team.  We waited many months, but since November we have been enjoying the energy, vitality and faithful service of our two newest members, two young women from the States.  We have fun together.  We pray together and we work together.  Our team days are a wonderful mix of learning, encouragement, challenge and fun.  We’re looking forward to a short termer with us next month from Madagascar!

Some of our old neighbor kid friends!

Relationships
One thing that doesn’t seem to be lacking here is relationships. We know so many people. Sometimes relationships can be tricky.  We’ve had our fair share (and often told you about it in our blog) of dealing with money issues, kids on our porch, going to wedding after wedding, helping neighbors give birth on the living room floor, and generally trying to figure out what people expect of us and how to be seen as generous, loving, wise, hospitable people in this culture.  But there’s another challenge we face: going deeper.  It’s a tricky business because you often don’t realize your friendship has moved to a new level until one day you realize, as your friend shares their troubles with you, that they’ve let you in.  It’s only then you realize that the previous weddings, hard interactions, or “conversations about nothing” have led to this moment.  We’ve been blessed to see many relationships go deeper and to share the hope that we have with people who are hurting.  In this past year we’ve participated in gatherings of the truth.  We’ve seen teammates share the story of the 2 kingdoms with a bus full of people.  We’ve seen women gather in fellowship and people pass through the waters into the light.  We’ve had opportunities to join in holiday celebrations and share the reasons for our celebrations as well.  We have much to be thankful for.

Prayer
As you know, we always end our blog with Prayers Answered and Prayers Requested.  We have seen so many prayers answered!  We are thankful for good health, generally.  The children have not been sick much and we have been spared from most illnesses.  Though Megan cut herself with a sharp knife, and a teammate had an aerosol can blow up in her face while burning trash, both are fine.  Megan’s back, though still an issue, has been manageable and we hope to resolve this problem of cysts in the new year.  Throughout all our travels (even returning to Africa in a snow storm) and the travels and arrival of new teammates, and visitors, it all has gone surprisingly smoothly.  We have asked you to pray for our team and we have seen our team grow from 3 to 6. The unity, mutual respect and multiplication of our work has been wonderful.  We asked you to pray for our kids at school this year, and they have done far better than we expected.  We are especially thankful that our 7 year old son asked for the kingdom of light to come into his heart.  We asked for prayer about getting visas and visas have come through.  We have 4 colleagues engaged to be married and dedicated to work on the islands.  Finally, we have asked you to pray for Tom’s friend Sterehi who has been separated from his wife all year.  In speaking with him this week, Tom learned that they are getting back together.  There is power in prayer!


PRAYERS ANSWERED
Our two teammates made it safely to mainland Africa for vacation and the one got her passport renewal paperwork turned in at the embassy. They seem to be having a good time. We made it through a crazy week of wedding celebrations! We feel like we were there when we needed to be and that we were good friends. We had a disagreement with some colleagues that had to be sorted out over email (not a great medium)— we are thankful that we have found unity and resolution together despite the limitations. Sterehi is back with his wife— this is a big answer to prayer!

PRAYERS REQUESTED
We are traveling on Sunday to the big island and then on to mainland Africa on Monday so Megan can seek medical treatment for her ovarian cysts. She has an initial appointment and probably redo tests previously done in October, but the current expectation is that she will have surgery to remove the cysts. Tom had a final study time with the group of men he has been meeting with— multiple of them are thinking through some difficult questions. Tom will go back on Thursday to encourage them one more time before we travel— pray for good interactions, good reflections and that these men would find clarity and truth in their reflections. We are making preparations to have a short-termer from Madagascar join us in February— we are very excited to have her! Some of the details and logistics have been complicated, pray for good direction for all involved as decisions are made and plane tickets are bought. Our newest teammates travel with us to mainland Africa for a 3 week orientation for new workers. They are anxious about leaving the islands right after having formed good contacts and started good routines— pray for a great time for them and that they will come back to the islands refreshed and encouraged and ready to jump right back in!