The Ups and Downs of the Month of Fasting

Less School- meant puzzle time!

Today is the thirteenth day in the Month of Fasting.  We are nearing the halfway point.  For those who have never experienced this month in a location like ours it is hard to comprehend the great change that overtakes the country and its people during this month.  The rhythms, expectations, needs and even speech patterns change during this month.  It effects nearly everything.  The days feel very different.

The first weeks are the hardest.  People’s bodies need to adjust to the daily fast.  Remember for their fast to “count” it must be a fast from all food and drink from sunup to sundown.  Bodies take time to adjust, and so the first days, most people are tired, suffering from headaches, or feeling groggy and hazy.  Life cycles start to adjust to a new normal.  Eating begins at sundown and continues into the night.  Some even wake up at 3 or 4am to eat again.  Many, to ensure they are getting enough to drink, wake up before dawn to drink a few liters of water.  Of course, later nights and late night eating and drinking all lead to late night bathroom visits.  The end result is less sleep, and often a slower, sleepy start to the morning.  But by 9am things are bustling and life is going on as normal but then by early afternoon, most have run out of steam.  Shops close, people go home to rest and women start cooking for the evening meal.  Kids still go to school but their classes all end by 12:00.  Our children now have a strange one-day-on, one-day-off week that includes Saturday so that no students or teachers have to have class in the afternoon. Try teaching an afternoon class during this schedule—trust me, it doesn’t work.  We don’t even attempt to teach at all during this month anymore. 

Lunchtime in the hallway

You may be wondering what else happens to our lives during this month.  Usually we don’t choose to fast as islanders do.  Different foreigners do different things each year, but this year we eat breakfast early, with our doors closed (but not before dawn).  We feed the children on a mat in the hallway for lunch while we skip lunch.  We keep a bottle of water in the bathroom for drinking.  And then we eat dinner at sundown like everybody else.  The idea is to respect those who are fasting while at the same time showing that we are not bound by the same legalism.  Skipping lunch gives us a sense of islanders’ plight and keeps our hearts sharpened to the spiritual aspects of this month.  We do like joining islanders to break the fast when we are invited (and on those days we will often fast with them as a sign of camaraderie)!  Generally life feels quieter and the days slower. We’re not teaching normal classes so we take the opportunity to catch up on other types of work and projects.

Old photo: all in traditional clothes except one

So that is how the changes in eating/cooking effect life, but this month isn’t just about fasting, it is also considered the most important religious month of the year.  For many islanders, it doesn’t matter what you do the rest of the year as long as this month, you show yourself faithful.  For those of greater religious leaning, it is a month to outdo others in personal holiness and impress others with your religious knowledge.  Attendance at the local places of worship goes way up this month.  There are special prayers that are sometimes transmitted over the loud speakers at night for everyone’s benefit.  Anything you can do to show that you are religious is encouraged.  People turn off their music and listen to sermons or recitations.  Soap operas and football matches are often replaced with religious programming.  Women cover their heads and everyone is dressed more nicely, traditionally and conservatively.  Now is the time to tell everybody what you should and shouldn’t do.  Now is the time to be reading or listening to your holy book at every free moment.

With everybody getting so religious this month, we can feel both put upon and excited.  We get asked LOTS of questions  this month which means lots of opportunities to share.  This is wonderful.  But at the same time, many people, feeling proud of how religious they are acting, want to use this opportunity to shame us, insult us or put us down.  We try not to let these things get to us, but some days it can be trying.  We focus on the fact that across the islands during this month people are thinking more about God and within all the religiosity we know there are those who are truly searching Him.  May they find Him.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
The earthquakes continue but we are thankful that there has not been an increase in intensity. The new family (with another group) has arrived and appears to be settling in well. Our kids are in their last week of homeschool for the year— we are thankful for the ways that they are learning and growing.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Tom and our teammates are all on their way to a neighboring nation to attend the wedding of our colleague from the small island and our former short-termer. Pray for smooth travels, for a happy wedding and for a good start to a strong marriage. Pray especially as the bride’s grandmother just died and her family is having to handle the grief and funeral just days before the wedding. Pray for Megan and kids as they are alone on Clove Island. Continue to pray for the month of fasting, for open hearts and opportunities to shine light in the darkness. There continues to be rumors and feelings of political unrest. We don’t expect anything to happen during the month of fasting but pray for the islands— for good leaders and a stable government.

Predicting Earthquakes

Playing with a friend

RATTLE, RATTLE, RATTLE - What???  Who is wrapping on our bedroom window? 

“Tom, Megan, wake up!” we hear our neighbor whispering loudly.

Tom goes out to the backdoor in his pjs.  “What’s going on?” He asks, bleary eyed.  Our neighbors are standing in the doorway.  Sleeping children draped over their shoulders, their eight year old swaying groggily at their side.

“Lock everything up in case of robbers, then get your children and get out.  The big earthquake is coming!”

“What?  What are they talking about,” Tom thought.  It took a moment for the language to register.  Finally, finding his words, “What do you mean, an earthquake is coming?”

“A big earthquake.  It’s coming.”  They say.  “Everyone’s going to sleep outside on the street.  Get your children.” 

“But you can’t know if an earthquake is coming.  What are you talking about?”

New cracks out front

By that point Megan has joined us and they explain it all to Megan again. “But you can’t know if an earthquake is coming.  It’s impossible.  I’m from California.  We have many earthquakes there.”  But our neighbors were convinced.  We stood with them in the doorway for a few more minutes and then returned to our beds while they left with their kids to sleep in the street.  It was 3:30am. Needless to say, no earthquake came. 

We have been experiencing a season of seismic activity.  Every couple days we’ve experienced some small tremors.  Nothing big enough to knock things over, but big enough to be felt and heard—and we’ve noticed some new cracks in the cement on our veranda!  But more interesting perhaps is the way of rumors and fear here on the islands.

We learned later that the rumor had begun on the neighboring French island.  Someone started the rumor that “the big one” was on it’s way and people all over that island headed out into the streets around 2am.  It reached our island about an hour later, around 3:00, and in both towns and villages around the islands people moved out of their houses to finish their night out in the open.  The speed and authority with which this rumor spread is somewhat remarkable.  In some places it was announced by loud speakers from mosques.  Ignorance and fear perpetuated the rumor.  We’ve learned that some knew that earthquakes could not be predicted, but many decided to go out anyway—just in case. 

In the aftermath of the earthquakes, an island friend told us, the prayer places have been full of people.  Many who don’t usually pray are going right now.  They are also placing blame for it.  Some say it is because a witch doctor buried a live cow and live cat and the earth is rejecting this dark sacrifice.  Others say it is because of the sinfulness of the people and people not following old traditions.  Classically, some religious leaders are pointing the finger at the sexually promiscuous behavior of women. (Not men, of course!) 

It is another illustration to us of  how the islands are gripped by fears and superstitions.  The ground occasionally rumbles and brings them up to the surface. Meanwhile we try to share our message of peace and hope.

No gas canisters for stove, so time to grill!

PRAYERS ANSWERED
We are thankful to hear that our sisters are meeting again after a long time of difficult schedule conflicts.  The brothers and sisters have returned from the training safe and well.  We’re hoping they have many positive things to share.  Our colleagues who have been trying to get their visas to live on the French island finally arrived last week after nearly 6 months of trouble.  We are so happy that they’ve made it and to have them close by again.  It sounds like their new house and transition to life on the French island is going well. There hasn’t been any gas canisters (used for stoves/ovens) for a couple months. Our gas canister ran out this past week, but just as we’re writing this post we’ve learned that the gas has arrived!

PRAYERS REQUESTED
These earthquakes aren’t normal for the islands— pray for continued safety and that these earthquakes would stop and not intensify. Continue to pray for the trials of the month of fasting— we have a guide for how to pray this month (email us if you’d like a copy). Our colleagues on the little island have been told by the island government that they do not want them there— they can still pursue a visa via the federal offices on the big island, but it is discouraging to have lost favor with the local authorities. Pray for softened hearts there. Another group working on Clove Island is welcoming a new family in the coming days— pray for them. It is often challenging for families to transition to the new language, culture and climate of the islands, but it could be even harder during the fasting month. Pray for a smooth transition.

Wrestle Time

Our boys and neighbor boys

Our five year old’s voice rang out through the house, “It’s time to wrestle!” A little while later, “Daddy?….. Let’s start wrestling!” The calls for wrestling continued until Tom was done with what he was doing and could turn his attention on our son. (It should be noted that ‘wrestling’ for our boys is mainly a lot of tickling and being thrown into pillows on the bed.)

Last Sunday however it was a very different image of wrestling— Jacob wrestling in the night on his way to reunite with his brother Esau. I don’t know if we’ve ever described what a Sunday morning looks like for us. We usually gather with our team. We take turns hosting at our various homes and whoever hosts takes the lead, choosing songs for us to sing and guiding our time as we study a passage together. Usually one person takes our kids out for Sunday school, but this Sunday there were only three of us adults so we decided to forgo the letter that we were reading and join the kids’ curriculum studying at Jacob’s nighttime wrestle match.

Potential wrestle partners?

We discussed it with the kids for awhile and then got them coloring their small craft while the adults dived deeper. It isn’t an easy story and we still have unanswered questions and musings.  What do we learn about people in this story? Why was Jacob wrestling?  Hadn’t he already been given a promise?  Hadn’t he already been blessed?  Why did he continue to wrestle?  What more blessing did he wish for?  What do we learn about God?  Why did he wrestle with Jacob in the first place?  Why did he agree to bless him? 

We discussed some of these questions for some time, but we always finish our time of study asking ourselves the questions:  What do we learn?  What will I change in my life because of these words?  How am I going to obey and do the things we have learned.  Sometimes the application of the passage is easy.  Other times it is more difficult, but we always eventually seem to find something important and personal before we are done.

This week we came away with wondering, “How’s my wrestling technique?”  Do I even wrestle at all?  Am I too quick to give in and let go and resignedly accept the way things are and so lose the blessing that might have been gained.  We have lived here many years now and we have seen many blessings, many answers to prayer, but there are still those promises that haven’t been fulfilled yet.  Things we have been asking for many years, things we want to see on these islands.  We may be persistent in asking for them, but have we wrestled for them?  Have we fought for them? 

The month of fasting is almost upon us, maybe that would be a good time to wrestle…

Tom & our daughter do homeschool experiments

PRAYERS ANSWERED
A visiting doctor was able to examine Ma Imani and believes that there is nothing to worry about.  We are relieved that our friend is okay and wait impatiently for her to return to our island.  Our colleague with the tumor is recovering well.  The tumor was the size of a grapefruit, but we learned that it was not cancerous and we are told she will make a full recovery! We are so thankful for this news.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Later this week begins the month of Fasting.  It is always a difficult and rewarding month.  Pray for stamina and wisdom for all of us.  There continues to be some political instability.  The current island president is making changes and it has not been well received.  Today in our town there was a confrontation between demonstrators and police. All of the schools ended up closing suddenly in response. Pray for peace. The islands have had a few minor earthquakes. This is not common. We pray that they stop and don’t intensify. Our one teammate is still in Kenya, pray that she’ll be ready to return to us soon.  Pray for growth and perseverance for our entire team (us included).  There is no news on our African colleagues’ situation except that they got their passports back.  We are still waiting for our colleague on the little island to get his visa.

Where?

The three birthday girls at special lunch

We live in a land without street names, without house numbers. People don’t have proper addresses here. Some places have fixed names, but many stores and businesses don’t have any signs and/or change their names on whims. Sometimes this causes confusion.

• When new people join our English library the first thing we ask is: “Write your name, address and phone number.” But ‘address’ always gives them pause. What do they put? When we see them hesitate, we reassure them, “Just put the name of your neighborhood.” With a look of relief they write it down. 
• Recently I was helping an island friend to fill out an application to attend a training course abroad— it asked for a variety of different addresses but if someone lives in the same neighborhood that they go to school or work, then the addresses are the same. There are no house numbers here, no street names. It is possible to rent a PO box and have a proper mailing address, but I personally don’t know of anyone that has one (except for other foreigners and organizations).

  

  Our daughter turned 10!

• This week a friend was trying to explain where he was going to start a satellite location of his school. We knew the neighborhood he was talking about fairly well, but it was still difficult to figure out where exactly it was. He took several minutes explaining the streets we would have to go down and how we would have to turn. Now we think we know where it is…maybe.
• While orienting new teammates it can be hard to explain where things are without showing them every single place. We come up with our own lingo, creating new landmarks in areas where all there is is small shops and homes. So among ourselves, we talk about the “white shop”, the “orange store”, the container shop, “the snack” shop, the “tan shop” and the “corner store”. Last week the “orange store” repainted. It is now pink! So the problem is now, do we rename it or call it “the store previously known as the orange store.”

It is not like every place here is nameless. Towns have names. Neighborhoods have names. Some big neighborhoods are split into sub-neighborhoods. There are named landmarks— schools, certain businesses and offices. It also helps if you know everyone. Then you can talk about the house next to the shop that is owned by so-and-so’s uncle’s wife (which always clears things up for us).

But usually if you really want to know where something is then someone has to take you there the first time. Only then will you really know. For some journeys you need a guide.  Thankfully, islanders are usually more than willing to take you.

Birthday hike up river

PRAYERS ANSWERED
Our daughter turned 10 years old today! We are very thankful for the kind and beautiful person she is becoming. Two of our teammates celebrated birthdays this past week too! We were very happy to be able to celebrate with them. One of our teammates had to travel to Kenya— we are thankful that her travels went smoothly and that there are people there to welcome her. The English Conference on the big island went well. Three of our teammates traveled over for it and we’re thinking we may have to do one on Clove Island too! Megan’s headaches have resolved— seems like it was some kind of virus going around.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Friends (from another African nation) who are fellow-workers on the small island had their passports seized by police this week. Apparently there is a court case forming against them as well. Pray for wisdom and favor for them. This is a first (that we know of) on the islands— islanders have had issues with the police/courts before but never foreign workers.  Scrutiny on the small island has increased in the past year or more, pray for all those living and working there. No news of our co-worker waiting for visa approval, keep praying. Another group on Clove Island will be welcoming a new family soon— pray for their transition to island life (which is always more challenging with children) and for easy adjustments to the climate, culture and language-learning. A colleague set to return to Clove Island had stomach pain  that ended up being a tumor. The tumor has been removed and they are waiting for test results on it in their home country. Pray for health and that they would be able to return to Clove Island soon. Continue to pray for the flare up in Megan’s back pain that it would get under control quickly. Pray for our teammate in Kenya that her time there would be helpful and restorative.

Dreams of a Kid-free Morning

Entertaining with a curtain

We love our kids very much and we love spending time with them. We love that our life on the islands means we see our kids a lot. But it is still nice to have some kid-free time once and awhile. 

We had just had three solid weeks without a single kid-less moment. There had been two weeks where the kids were off from local school and then one week where the kids were on opposing schedules**, so someone was always home. Now all three kids finally had school in the morning. Four kidless hours were all ours. We didn’t have big plans, but we were looking forward to having some quiet, getting some work done and maybe running an errand or two.

I was just finishing my time of prayer and study, when the woman who helps with some of our housework came up the stairs. It was normal for her to come on Monday morning, but this morning she had her 10 month old baby and her 2 year old cousin in tow. She sat down to tell me her story. Her aunt was in labor and was having a hard time of it. They had gone to the hospital but the docs there wanted to do a c-section, so they left and found a clinic in another town. Her mom was gone helping her aunt, so there was no one at home to watch the little ones.

Two year old with her chair & ball

I thought I understood the point of the story, so I told her, “No problem. You don’t need to work here today. You have to watch the little ones.” But she shook her head, “No, I want to work. I’ll do the laundry and the kids will stay here.”

Ahh… so the point of the story was not explaining why she couldn’t work. It was explaining why we needed to babysit while she worked. I don’t think many people in the US would bring their kids to their workplace and then expect their employer to watch them, but there we were. So much for our kidless morning.

She made it sound like the kids would just watch themselves. But they are 10 months old and 2 years— that wasn’t going to happen. Time to reformulate my morning plans. I quickly tried to baby-proof any major hazards, got out some baby-appropriate toys. The kids were pretty easy to please.  After awhile, the two-year old found a little chair and a ball and just sat there hugging the ball to her chest. Soon I saw her eyes drooping— her mom’s labor excitement meant she had been up early. Then the baby starting rubbing her eyes and fussing. Her whines brought her mom away from her work outside where she was hand-washing clothes. And before long both little ones were settled down and resting.

Naptime

Then we had some time of quiet. We got some work done and even ran a couple errands. So ultimately we got what we had been hoping from the morning. We might have looked forward to a kidless morning, but life rarely goes to plan here on the islands.  Just because things don’t follow our plans, doesn’t make them bad.  It may not have been the kidless morning we expected, but it also wasn’t a bad morning, at the very least the kids were super cute…

PRAYERS ANSWERED
The consultant checking for the language project finished! They were able to do even more than they hoped. We are thankful that we got to connect with one of our colleagues from the small island as he passed through this past week. We are thankful for our team and how well they have all gotten along and how they have worked to care and support each other in tough times. Our very good friend Ma Imani has been on the big island for the past several months due to illness- we just got word that suggests that her medical problems are not as serious as feared. We hope she can return to Clove Island soon.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
There have been encouraging signs on the smallest island that they will be able to get their needed visa from the local government there, but it needs to be signed this week- pray that is actually happens. The big island is doing their annual English Conference this coming week. We have three teammates traveling to attend. Our two newest teammates are celebrating their birthdays this week— pray that they will be encouraged and well-loved during this their first birthday away from home.  The former worker we mentioned last week has made it to the islands and is reconnecting with old friends. Pray that his visit would be used to both encourage and challenge. Our teammates have had a hard time meeting to study with the ladies— one is still very interested, the other has been strangely absent— pray for wisdom about how to proceed. A island sister is feeling pressure from family to not meet and study with others— pray for wisdom and strength for her and for the softening of hearts in her family. Megan has been dealing with some back pain (aggravating the old problem spot) and some new kind of headache. Pray for healing and relief.


**On the islands, preschool and kindergarten is always in the morning, but elementary school has an alternating schedule. There are two groups of kids and one week half will go to school in the morning and half go in the afternoon. Then the next week they switch and the other group goes in the morning. For our kids it means that one week, all three go to school in the morning and the next week one (our kindergartener) goes in the morning and the other two go in the afternoon. When not in local school, we do homeschool!

Pursuing New Interests

Tom & boys at match

One of the great things about working on the islands is the ability to put into practice the ideas we read in books.  When we went to school for further studies we read many, many great books, but so much of it remained in the theoretical.  It’s easy enough to see the wisdom and logic of an idea, but is it practical? Is it realistic?  Does it work?  You can’t know these things until you have a chance to put them into practice.

This week we were reading as a team about the importance of being an accepted and valued member of your society.  To do this takes a great deal of time and effort and it starts—not surprisingly—with language.  But it doesn’t end there.  There are other aspects like, how we dress, what we do for work, how we show hospitality, that all play a vital role in making us members of our adopted society.  Another thing that might seem obvious, but is an important part of this integration is friendship.  Friendship may look different in our adopted community, but it is still a vital part of integration.  And yet, it is not always easy.  Sometimes the distances between culture, religion, education, and experience are so great, it’s difficult to find common ground.  The simple question, “What can we talk about?” Becomes a major hurdle.

The match

This is where our reading this week gave us a good reminder: “If you want to find something to talk about you may need to become interested in what interests your friends.”  In other words, “Expand your own interests.”

And so it was we found ourselves attending a local handball final.  For those of you who don’t know handball, you might want to check it out.  It’s actually quite exciting to watch.  It’s like a cross between basketball and soccer. Fast paced, high scoring, and a lot of fun.  But the other benefit was to see friends come by and join us in the stands. We had come with one friend, but before long three others had taken seats around us and we were all enjoying the match together.  A few others came by to say hello and tell us which team was “their team.” 

Will our interest in handball lead to other invitations, other conversations, deeper friendships?  Time will tell, but as we sat in the stands, enjoying the game with friends around us, I couldn’t help but feel like… it’s nice to feel accepted.” 

PRAYERS ANSWERED
The consultant checking for the language project has gone well despite different challenges along the way. Pray for endurance as they finish up this round of checking! Praise God for more signs of belonging—just today we had two different mothers entrust their babies with us while they went to do things they needed to do. 

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Pray for us as we continue to learn what it looks like to be members in island community. There is a project funded by the outside and carried out by friends from the big islands that distributes boxes to school children. It is just finishing up on our island. Pray that it would effectively spread the light as it hopes to do. Pray for us as team leaders (and Tom as the interim islands leader)— we are called to speak into complex situations that require wisdom and discernment that we don’t always have. We are thankful that we are well supported by others. May God protect us from grave errors and help us to lead well. Pray for good rest and encouragement for our team. Colleagues on the small island are having trouble with visas again— pray for wisdom about the right course of action for them.  Pray for favor before local authorities. We are looking forward to having a former worker/leader from the islands return for a visit— pray for easy travels and an encouraging time.

Are We Comparing or Following?

Shot of English Club

The disciple Peter was reeling from what had just been revealed about his future, from what he was being called to. Seeing someone else, he pointed and said, “But, what about him?” 

As we discussed this story on Sunday I thought about how true Peter’s response is.  How quick we are to look at others and compare. 

Comparison—how it dogs us—sometimes spurring us onto better things, but more often than not hindering us.  We have both witnessed and experienced its poisonous qualities on our teams.  I can remember first arriving in Africa, and after six months of language study, still feeling so incapable of communication.  In this turmoil of self pity, I listened to my teammate (who had arrived at the same time as me) make conversation with a neighbor, making jokes and connecting with people.  At that moment I could have rejoiced for my teammate.  But instead I looked inward and wondered why I couldn’t do that.  Why was I such a failure?  Why did I have to struggle in this area and he didn’t?

Our youngest loves the hammock

Later on we became team leaders and since then we have seen the comparison poison at work in our teams.  Try as we might to keep things equal and fair, each team member has different needs, different struggles, different talents.  Yet on every team, with both the mature and immature, the question, “What about him?” seems always near at hand in our thoughts.  It’s like we can’t help ourselves!  And it isn’t just our teammates, we are often no better as leaders, asking ourselves, “Why aren’t we better at this?”  “Why are we the ones caught up in this crisis?”  “Couldn’t someone else be shouldering these burdens?”

The comparison doesn’t even have to be with the people right around us, yet it can still wrangle:  For example, we read books of amazing people around the world, who have loved deeply, sacrificed greatly and saw incredible things happen. We hope to be inspired, and yet we can be left in despair at their greatness and our feebleness..   Or there are stories from home, updates on social media that remind us of the kind of life back home that we have given up to be on the islands, and we find ourselves wondering, why couldn’t my life be like hers?  It does us no good to think like this, and yet it happens without conscious intention. We see ourselves in a hard place and we ask, why isn’t anyone else facing this?

Our youngest takes photo of Megan

Perhaps it is that we want company on the journey. If we have struggles ahead, we at least want someone going through it with us. But that is where we forget the reality of what lies ahead.   When the disciple Peter asked “What about him?”  The reply was, “If I want him to live until I come, what is that to you? You follow me!” 

The command was “Follow me!” That means we’re not going it alone! We have a partner in this struggle!  Our lives will not look like anyone else’s and we will be all the better for it. The one we follow does not compare us to others.  He sees only the person He has made us to be.   We can’t just copy the person next to us and hope we’re going the right way.  Rather, we must look ahead at the one we’ve been called to follow.  Let’s stop looking side to side. Let’s ignore the distractions and comparisons. Let’s fix our eyes on Him and yell out, “Lead on, I’m with you!”

PRAYERS ANSWERED
The kids have returned to local school after a good break between trimesters.  We are pleased to see that they are adjusting back to school easily.  It seems as if the family across the street who have been so insistent in asking for things are asking a bit less plus we are feeling more comfortable about how to proceed with them. Thank you for your prayers concerning that situation.  Tom’s study group continues to go well.  Although talking about apologetics was not terribly pleasant, it seemed to address many of the misconceptions and ended in a good place.  Pray that we can move on to more fruitful discussions soon.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
We just learned that our former pastor and friend passed away. Pray with us for his wife, adult kids and grandkids and let us rejoice together over his life lived well. We look forward to seeing him again.  The language work’s consultant checking continues this week.  Continue to pray for good and clear communication: technologically, culturally and interpersonally!  We have been hoping for every one on our team to have opportunities to be studying with others.  We’re about half way there.  Pray for current and future study groups.