Walking Through Open Doors

At the table at Markabu's house

There are many blessings to being a family on the islands, but one downside is that we rarely get invitations that extend to the whole family.  It is common for singles to get adopted into island families and regularly invited for meals. But islanders are less likely to invite a family. It is assumed the wife of the family can cook for them. Also some islanders feel like they have to have an extravagant spread if they are inviting an entire family of foreigners (something they may not feel if it is just one or two people). Then there is the reality that men and women just don’t do things together very much. Other than the month of fasting, men usually eat and relax separately from women and children. So Megan usually gets invitations to women’s things, Tom to men’s things, but family to family invitations aren’t common.

Tom had been talking to Markabu and Faswiri (two of our English Club attendees) a few weeks before and had mentioned enjoying meeting people’s families. Markabu had responded by saying that he had always wanted to invite Tom to his home but something had made him self-conscious about it . So then last week we were pleasantly surprised when Markabu came up and asked not just Tom but our whole family to come to his house and meet his family on the holiday this past weekend. We quickly accepted.

The ladies of the family

We are often looking for open doors, doors toward deeper relationships, doors toward getting to know whole families, doors toward meaningful conversations. Even more we look for door openers, people who act as bridges into communities. Our friend was opening the door and inviting us in.

Now nothing overly dramatic happened on this visit. We learned where Markabu lived. We met his family (mother, sisters, nieces, nephews). The women didn’t eat with us, but they surrounded us with words of welcome and giving gifts to Megan. His mother and oldest sister had made the food except for the one treat which was the traditional holiday gift of his grandmother. We learned about how his brothers have studied abroad, each in a different country. We learned that his father had died. We learned about how he met Faswiri and about their shared past times. The visit ended with pictures taken on multiple cameras and with sincere words of thanks all around. “My family is very nice,” our student said, encouraging us to return and visit.

It was a deepening of our relationship with him, a beginning of new relationships, a new opportunity.

The men

We didn’t necessarily know this opportunity was coming. Markabu had been one of Megan’s first students when we got to Clove Island in 2013, but he hasn’t been a consistent visitor to our home or club. Why after 4 years did he suddenly decide to invite us into his home? So perhaps it was Tom’s comment about families that cracked the door open and then Markabu held it open. Whatever the case, a part of us being here on the islands is being faithful to walk through the doors opened before us— who knows where they will lead. 

PRAYERS ANSWERED
The tummy bug ended up hitting Tom and our older son too. But we are thankful for our answered prayers that it passed quickly and that Megan and our youngest were spared. Thanks for praying for our kids— this morning our older son prayed for God to come into his heart and change him! We are very thankful for this desire planted in his young heart. Pray that it would continue to grow. He’s excited. Megan just got back from an all-day women’s retreat organized by island women. It was a great chance to connect and encourage each other. We are thankful for the island women taking on leadership roles.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
We pray for Markabu and his family and our relationship with them. This week is very full. We just had the women’s retreat, we have visitors coming, we have  the leadership gathering that we are helping host and we have the grand opening of our office (which means having up to 50 islanders to the office for speeches, prayers, blessings and snacks). Pray that we would get everything that needs to be done finished. Pray for a good leadership gathering— that people would find tickets to travel to us,  for unity and mutual encouragement. Two islanders have asked to pray for things— Bweni has asked for prayer for her youngest brother who is often mistreated and bullied because his skin is much darker than the rest of the family. He is a kind boy and we pray that Bweni can be a light to him and the rest of her family. Ma Imani’s mother also asked for prayer for her health (she struggles with hypertension) and also with feelings of being alone— she’s getting older, has had grandkids thrust into her care and she has had tense relationships with various children. We pray that her children could come around her and that she could feel supported and loved.