Going On Retreat

On boat heading to goat island

The month of fasting has arrived. With it people expect life rhythms to change, for restaurants to close, and for people to be generally grumpy.  So just before the month of fasting begins, people want to party.  In a subtler but similar vain to Carnivale or Mardi Gras—it’s one last chance to do all the fun things before getting all boring, serious and religious (from an islander perspective).  So people make a point of going out and partying.  Fortunately, the island version of this is pretty tame.  It usually involves going on a picnic, eating a bunch of grilled meat, and dancing to loud music.

Well, since the month of fasting is often a rather long and difficult month for us foreigners as well, we thought it might be nice for our team to take a little retreat before the month began.  The thing is, taking a retreat on Clove Island is never quite as easy as one would like it to be.  Basically, it takes planning and work.  We know this going into it, and we still choose to go.  Everyone agreed even with Tom’s history…

It seems that Tom is something of a bad luck charm when it comes to camping and hiking on the islands.  Blue skies turn to gray and rain clouds move in at the whisper of him even suggesting a camping trip.   In fact, he should probably contact the local weather stations and let them know of his plans ahead of time so they could forecast with greater accuracy.

The bungalows- very few structures on goat island

So somewhat predictably, despite the week of sunshine and blues skies, as we left the house that morning, it started to rain.  It rained most of the bumpy 1.5-hour van ride to the town at the tip of Clove Island.  From there we would take a fishing boat to get to the small uninhabited “goat island” that rests off the tip.  The boat transport was not ready on our arrival, so we moved our supplies into someones home.  Shortly after it began to pour. 

But this is not a blog about how rain destroyed our plans.  This is about finding gratitude in the breaks.  The rain would come on and off throughout our overnight on goat island, but we had reprieves so that we were still able to go to the beach, climb along the rocky shore, search tide pools for crabs and fish, cook a dinner of hotdogs and breadfruit over the fire, enjoy some campfire time and looking at stars, and finally the sound of heavy rains while we were snug in our dry bungalows that night.

Hiking past fallen baobab

The next day we climbed to the top of the hill on goat island.  On the way up it poured.  We couldn’t have been much wetter.  But when we reached the top the sun came out, and we were surrounded by a world of green that was breathtakingly beautiful dropping down to the ocean on every side.  It was beautiful and we were thankful.

A boat ride and another taxi van would get us home where we all felt the need to rest after our retreat.  But that’s how retreats go on Clove Island.  Refreshing in a tiring sort of way.  But we had fun, the rain stopped when it counted, we had fellowship, and we saw some soul-soothing beauty.  And so, we are thankful.

PRAYERS ANSWERED

Rainy hiking in swimsuits- at top

Our kids exams have been going well without too much fear or stress for which we are very thankful. They still have exams for the rest of the week, so please keep praying.  The month of fasting has only been going for a couple of days but already we’ve had some great opportunities to share.  We are thankful for these opportunities. 

PRAYERS REQUESTED
We have many opportunities to share this month but it can also be daunting, tiring and frustrating as person after person asks us, “Are you fasting?  You’re not able?”  We have brainstormed a lot of thought-provoking ways of responding. Pray for perseverance and patience and people who will actually listen to why we are different.  It is our hope that this month of fasting and prayer would spur people of the light to fast and pray for those in darkness.  Pray that the light would shine in the darkness and that it would enter many hearts.   There is a day-by-day guide for the month, email us if you’d like to receive it. The month of fasting means our teaching commitments are greatly reduced and we try to tackle some projects that we don’t usually have time for— pray that we would find good work time and motivation to complete these projects during the month.

Early Morning Delivery

Our early am visitor with her little brother

Is this a dream?  I am slowly pulled from sleep by a small voice, very close telling me to wake up. Any parent has had the experience of being woken in the dark by their child. But this wasn’t my child. With a bit of a shock, I realize it’s our 6 year old neighbor girl standing at the foot of the bed asking me to get up and come downstairs.  “Is this a dream? How did she even get in here?” I wonder. (There is a back stairwell that leads downstairs to our neighbors’ house.  It’s usually locked and barricaded…)

It isn’t a dream.  A little island girl is standing at the end of the bed telling me to come.  “I’m coming,” I say. She waits for me to wrap something around myself and we go down together. On the floor of their entryway is her 9-month pregnant mother (Twamaya), legs splayed. A grandmother is rubbing her tummy. No other adults are around. Quickly the situation is clear—she is about to give birth.  She was supposed to go to the clinic (which is literally less than a block away), but she’s not going to make it. She needs me to call and wake up the doctor so he can come. Per usual, she doesn’t have any phone credit.

I find my phone and go to the top of the stairs where there is reception. The phone rings for awhile before a sleepy doctor answers. Twamaya tells me what to say, “Tell him, the child is at the door. I can’t come. He must come here. Hurry.” I get the message to the doctor. He’s coming. By the time I get to the bottom of the stairs, the head is crowning. I’m not sure if the grandmother is a proper midwife, but she’s taking charge. There are no clean cloths prepared. The floor under Twamaya isn’t clean. This was not a planned home-birth. I get some pillows for her back, but Twamaya immediately tells me to call the doctor back and tell him the baby is already coming out. By this point the head is out.

I don’t know if there is much point calling again, but I do. At least I can make sure the urgency of the case is clear. As I hang up, I hear a splash. The baby is out. I’m at the bottom of the stairs in a second. The baby is on the floor and the grandmother can’t get a grip on the slippery newcomer, so I grab the baby and hold her to her mother’s belly. After a brief moment, the baby starts crying and Twamaya mutters the traditional words of thanks to God.

Megan with new baby (minutes old)

The doctor arrives quickly with a look of chagrin on his face that seems to say “Couldn’t she have made it the 200ft to my clinic?” I hold the baby as he cuts the cord and wraps the baby in a clean medical blanket. I hold and quiet the baby while he sees to Twamaya. Someone asks if it’s a boy or a girl because even though the ultrasound had indicated a girl, no one has really checked. So I open up the wrapping and confirm, Twamaya has a new little girl.

Once the baby is weighed and cleaned a little, I’m told to dress the baby. I find the diaper bag packed for the hospital and the planned outfit. Twamaya still hasn’t delivered the placenta so I go upstairs with the little one and wipe the rest of the blood from her head. Finally 15-30 minutes post-birth, I hand the baby to her father and express my congratulations.

I go upstairs and wash my bare feet that had been in a puddle of afterbirth on the tile floor and decided I might as well try to get some more sleep. Who knows what the rest of the day will hold?

PRAYERS ANSWERED
We thank God that we could be there to support and assist Twamaya in the birth of her baby and that she has a healthy baby! Our colleague on the small island has a visa! He ended up going to Volcano Island to get it and we pray that he doesn’t have any more issues on the small island. Our middle son had a good week of school last week, but is still easily anxious about it. Keep praying. We had a safe overnight retreat with our team to a little islet off the tip of Clove Island— all the rain put a damper on things but it was a fun adventure and we saw God’s provision throughout. 


PRAYERS REQUESTED
The month of fasting is set to begin this coming weekend— this is a month of increased religious focus for islanders and we haven’t have unique opportunities to share and good conversations. Pray for good interactions with our friends and neighbors and that we would be ready with good answers for the questions we will undoubtedly receive. Our older kids (9 & 7 yrs old) will begin end-of-year exams in local school in just a few days— they missed the first two trimesters of school so are a little behind. We don’t care much about their results, but pray that it would not be a stressful time for them and that we would be able to adequately support them so that the local school year ends well for them.

What's her name?

We’ve known a lot of single young men during our years on the islands. When we first met Sahara we were living on Volcano Island and he was just a another poor university student.  But several years have passed now, he traveled, studied abroad, and returned to Clove Island.

Sahara is now in his 30s and this is the time when men in Clove Island traditionally look for a wife.  Young men can’t marry because they haven’t established themselves. But a man in his 30’s has had time to get a job and become someone.  Sahara found a nice girl, from the town where he grew up.  She’s all of 19 years old, probably 15 years younger than him. 

The groom from the wedding Tom attended this week

This is pretty common on Clove Island: Older man marries teenage girl.  An island friend whose own 17 year old daughter will be married off this summer was telling me how he spoke to the groom:
“You will be like a father to her.  You must take good care of her.  She will be your responsibility.”  As he spoke these things, he had no idea how strange it sounded to our ears.

This week Megan and our daughter went to Sahara’s initial engagement ceremony. It was a gathering of women praying a blessing over the coming marriage and over the initial giving of gold jewelry from the man to his bride to seal the engagement. The actual couple are not at the ceremony. All the women gather in one room while the bride waits in a back room and the groom-to-be is not even around. After waiting hot and sweaty in a room packed with chanting women, a familiar face stood up and addressed us all. She is a well-known wedding singer, hired by people to lead group singing and to give speeches on behalf of the families. She was giving the official speech and presenting the gold to the bride-to-be’s family. She repeated Sahara’s name a lot, proclaiming his love, virtues and good intentions and showing off his gift of gold. But multiple times when she got to the girl’s name, she paused and the crowd would have to tell her the name so she could say it and continue. When she was finished, she turned around and revealed that she was actually related to the bride-to-be and so she proceeded to give another speech thanking Sahara’s family for the gold and expressing the girl’s family’s happiness in the coming marriage.

Tom went to another wedding ceremony this past week where more than one speaker couldn’t remember the bride’s name. The uncle of the groom stood up and made a speech: “We are so happy for Djamal and his beautiful bride, ummm, what’s her name again?”

Our American upbringing might want to get immediately upset over the fact that these young women aren’t given enough thought for their names to even be remembered, but in the island context, we at least understand why this happens. These girls haven’t had a chance to establish themselves. Unmarried girls don’t go to society events and if they are only teenagers then they haven’t had a chance to get a job or do anything notable. Men have to establish themselves somewhat before they get married, but for the women, the act of getting married is most girl’s first real foray into the greater society. It is traditionally after marriage that most island women make a name for themselves in the community.

Participation in ceremonies is for married women like these

We want to acknowledge that the islands is not like a lot of other similar countries. The islands are a place where women can be powerful. They can be leaders in their communities and their opinions will be listened to. They can do great things and make a name for themselves that can be all their own and not necessarily dependent on their father or husband… but it does seem that first they have to get married.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
The complicated situation with a former employee of the language project has finally been resolved. Everyone is thankful that it is finally settled and that God provided a clear way to resolution. Ma Imani’s family is on speaking terms again— we pray for continued healing of relationships. We have an office! We signed a contract and exchanged money and keys.

PRAYERS REQUESTED
Pray that Sahara will be a good husband and for marriages in general on the islands. Continue to pray for our colleague having visa issues on the small island. He is coming to visit us this coming weekend for a brief visit but it is possible that he won’t be able to stay on the small island in which case he would join us on Clove Island. We’d be happy to have him, but he has already established and put much work into his life on the small island.  It would also mean that there could be problems for new colleagues on the small island in the future. We are hoping a resolution will be found.  Pray as we work to outfit and use our new office space that we’d be able to shine brightly from that location and into that neighborhood. Pray for our middle son (7 years old)— the transition of the past few months( back to the islands and into local school) has been hardest on him and we see signs of the stress in his behavior. There has been a teacher’s strike on the island in its second month (not our kids’ school). They are close to calling the entire school year a wash which would mean that the end of the year exams wouldn’t happen and all the kids would have to repeat the year—pray for resolution.

A Little Bit of Culture Shock

Just the beginning of the cloud of dust

We’ve been here quite a while now.  We have a pretty good understanding of life and culture on the islands, but that doesn’t mean we are immune to feeling the occasional pangs of culture shock.  We had a funny little incident happen this week that is worth mentioning in this respect.

“Meso” our landlady and the tile mason said.  Since arriving to our house there has been some broken tile on our kitchen counter that our landlady has consistently told us will be fixed soon.   We have lived here long enough to know that most time commitments are very relative.  So an answer of “soon” or even “meso” (which means tomorrow in the local language) can be a long time in coming.  So “tomorrow” had stretched for two months. But now the tile mason was actually there which did seem like a good sign.  It meant that it was on his radar and probably, when he had time, he would come and fix the tile.  Sure enough, no one came the next day or the day after that.  “Tomorrow” is a relative term.

Megan was about to start fixing dinner three days later around 6:00pm when our landlady arrives with the tile mason.  He’s ready to work.  “Meso” has arrived.  Quickly we start clearing the counter of all the clutter that had accumulated and we grabbed some sheets and covered some of the things in the kitchen.  This seemed good enough for the mason who was eager to get working.  He plugged in his tile saw and got ready to start.  Before he turned it on he said to me—“You should shut that door.”  He motioned to the door across the way.  That’s when the culture shock set in.

Our daughter turned 9!

Suddenly I realized, “if he wants me to shut that door that means this job is going to be dustier than I thought.”  Sure enough the very first cut sent tile and cement dust spewing out in a great cloud.  As he got to work cutting out the broken tile, I realized there was still work to be done.  Soon I had shut all the doors in the house, moved everything in the living room to the far side of the room (as far from the work as possible) and watched a bit forlornly as dust settle on all the clean dishes in the drying rack and on all the things on all the shelves we hadn’t covered. Urgh…Feelings welling up—annoyance, anger, frustration…culture shock strikes again.

I think the shock was a little sharper because of our experience in the States.  You may remember our blog about water coming through the ceiling and the concurrent resolution to that disaster?  What I specifically remember is how carefully and thoroughly the workers in the states covered everything.    There was not an inch of furniture or floor that wasn’t covered.  They even put up a wall of plastic to keep dust from seeping into other rooms.  I remember at the time thinking that it was overkill.  Now as I watched the air fill with a fine grey mist that permeated the entire house before settling on and in everything, I found myself longing for that thoroughness which we saw in the States.

The shock didn’t last too long.  One thing about less preparation meant the whole process went quicker.  After about an hour he had finished the job and swept up the dust as well as he could in the immediate area of his work.  He did a nice job.  The new tile looked good.

After he left Megan started our postponed dinner plans and we both got to work dusting and sweeping and mopping.  Our landlady came up and grabbed a rag too and helped out.  Before long things were nearly back to normal.  We’re still finding dusty pots, pans and various other things, but it’s nothing that a quick rinse can’t take care of, and now I know what to expect next time somebody has to fix a tile in my house.

In front of a possible office location

PRAYERS ANSWERED
A few colleagues have left the islands.  One for home assignment and two with no plans to return.  We are so thankful for all the hard and faithful work they have given over the years and the light they have shared with us and islanders.  Our daughter had a great birthday this past week and is now 9 years old!  Our team continues to work well together and we are thankful for the new teammates preparing to join us and the news of others who might be interested in joining our team.


PRAYERS REQUESTED
We are still waiting for some resolution for two complicated situations.  The first involves a former employee of the language project which has yet to be resolved.  Things are moving forward and we are happy for unity among the committee which had to decide what to do.  Pray that the employee will agree to the generous terms.  Secondly, a colleague on the little island continues to have trouble getting his visa.  The situation will come to a head in the next few weeks.  It may even mean that he comes to work on our island while things are figured out.  Pray for favor with the government and the issuing of his visa. We have been looking to open an office and we recently found a good location, but we’ve run into some trouble figuring out the details of the rent.  Pray that everything would work out well if this is the place where we are meant to be.

Is Meat an Innovation?

English Club discussion

“There can be no innovation!” he declared boldly, “The prophet did not celebrate it, so we can not celebrate it… It is just another day.” Several times he iterated the point: “We can only do what our prophet did.”

Two or three of our English club attendees started to gang up on him. “The prophet did not go on airplanes, do you use an airplane?” “The holiday is not an innovation. It was an important day in the prophet’s life.”

The discussion started to go in circles and was becoming heated, so we pushed it in another direction by asking how different people had marked the previous day (the contested holiday). One man volunteered that he and much of his village fasted the day, breaking the fast with a big meal at sunset. Immediately one of the men who had made the point about airplanes said, “You should not fast on this day. It is forbidden. The prophet did not fast, we should not fast.”

Getting ready to butcher on the beach

Others chimed in on this second debate, questioning whether people could or even should fast on this day. We reviewed some vocab words like: forbidden, allowed, required. It seems there is a lot of confusion about this holiday.

Internationally it is a more minor religious holiday. Lots of countries that hold the same beliefs as the islands, don’t really do anything to celebrate it. Even volcano island doesn’t do much special. But on our island it is a special day. We have compared it to Thanksgiving before. Schools are closed for two days so people can go to their home villages and be with family. In terms of activities, mostly people just cook and eat. Women cook all day. Some eat all day as well, some fast and only eat in the evening. But in any case it is a day where special foods are prepared that Clove islanders don’t normally eat— the most important being…MEAT!

Meat on the islands is usually frozen and imported. But on this one day of the year, Clove Islanders all try to eat fresh meat. There aren’t many cows on the islands and if it weren’t for this one day of the year, you’d wonder why they kept cows at all. But this day starts after the early morning prayer with the guiding of cows to their places of slaughter. Crowds gather not so much to watch the killing and butchering as to make sure they will get their fresh meat.  Usually everyone has already put their dibs in on a certain number of kilos or cut. People who didn’t plan ahead will be hard-pressed to find any fresh meat for purchase, every bit of the cow is already reserved.

Portioning out the meat

Tom and our older two went down to the beach that morning and watched some of the action. One cow was feebly kicking as we arrived, its life blood draining from it’s body.  We then watched it be skinned, gutted and separated.  Other children played with various cow parts - a head, an utter, a tail, while nearby their parents haggled in a crowd around a second cow which had already been divided.  Meat, fat and organs got thrown onto scales and then into plastic bags.  One by one people trickled away from the crowd with their purchases as others arrived, ready to argue,  in hopes of finding a kilo or two.

No one seems to place any religious significance on the eating of fresh meat. No one could even tell us how it started. The other islands don’t do it. It seems that perhaps this is a Clove Island “innovation” on the day. And while no one would say it’s required, and some would debate whether it is forbidden or allowed, it seems that most Clove Islanders like this holiday, regardless of what the prophet might of eaten that day.

PRAYERS ANSWERED
Twama hasn’t given birth, her premature labor stopped and she was able to stay with some family while she recovered from the incident. Megan and our daughter had a fun trip to the big island. The travel between the islands wasn’t terribly pleasant, but they got there and back safely. They were so glad to go to the big dance performance and see all the hard work our colleagues put into it and all the love they had poured into all those young girls dancing on stage. It was a special trip. Our minor ailments seem to be improving, our youngest ears are doing much better and the skin infections seem to be clearing up. 


PRAYERS REQUESTED
The situation with Ma Imani’s family is progressing, but not necessarily toward forgiveness and reconciliation. We keep praying for more honest conversations with members of the family really listening to each other with love and patience. Two of our colleagues (the dance teachers) are leaving the islands this week with no definite plans of returning— pray that they can end well, having good final interactions with the islanders they have known and loved over the past several years. Pray for the resolution of a conflict with an islander that used to work on the language project, he has been let go for several reasons and now is refusing to return one of the work computers unless his demands are met. It is a complicated situation that requires lots of wisdom, discernment and grace for all involved.